Nikkipedia

According to my chart, you are FAT.

If you’ve never considered visiting Kent, I feel quite sure that I can change your mind with this post. It’s an amazing place, and I’m sure you’ll agree that these local news stories support this completely.

Visit Herne Bay!

Local artist commissions Gary Glitter sticks of rock.

Glam rock. Suck it and see.

The local artist, who lives in Herne Bay, commissioned 1200 sticks of rock, with a picture of Herne Bay on the inside, and Gary Glitter’s name through the middle. The boxes containing the sticks of rock arrived graffitied with ‘wrong’ and ‘sicko’. Early indications would suggest that these weren’t going to be popular.

Sadie Hennessy continued regardless, distributing the sticks of rock to passers by, and, in that well known and revered marketing tactic, left piles of the sticks of rock outside public toilets and encouraged people to take them.

I might be alone in this, but I was brought up not to accept sweets from strangers, and not to eat things off the floor. To me, her choice of distributing the art was the start of a flawed from the start plan.

Sadie commissioned the rock after rumours last year that Gary Glitter was to set up home in the sleepy seaside town that is Herne Bay, which shocked local residents. Fearing that there wasn’t enough local outrage at this news, she decided to further incite and provoke, with the unholy image of Gary Glitter being at the centre of the town of Herne Bay, tainting the picturesque image from the outside, and him being represented a long, hard, tasty sweet, popular with children.

Visit Sittingbourne!

I live in Sittingbourne. It’s a marvellous place. This is a local representative, one of our Carnival Princesses, a local beauty and sweetheart, with an ASBO.

ASBO Princess is no dancing queen.

She’s representing this town, in the bits that she’s not banned from. Really, this needs no further comment, I’ll leave the final words with Fred’s comment on the original article.

Fred wrote: “Fantastic, an asbo princess, but why not just hand the crown to a 15 year old mum of 3 and show everyone what this towns really about”

Class. Really, come visit. It’s this year’s Carnival THIS WEEKEND why not come along to see which criminal is crowned Queen this time? I can’t wait. Just please take me with you when you leave.

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a man in possession of a flag-bearing car, must be in want of a larger penis.” (Jane Austin, Pride and Prejudice)

Today I spotted these multi-flagged cock-mobiles.

Left wanker
Total flag count: 4

Right wanker
Total flag count: 4
2 window flags
1 aerial flag
1 side window sun shade

Today’s flag wanker winner!

It is best viewed from behind.

Total flag count: 7
4 window flags
2  side window sun shade flags
1 large flag displayed in the rear windscreen

WHY?!